Shadow Rider
by LavenderGale
Summary: This is a possible back story for Murtagh up until Galbatorix learns he and Thorn's true names.  It tells some of his side of things and shows his human side.  It also gives him the oppertunity to love.
1. Chapter 1

Authors Note:

I was uncertain about writing fan fiction for inheritance, but one day a certain bunch of images popped into my head and I had to write about them. Figured I might as well share, so forgive my imperfections it has been a while since I read the books, except in repeat excerpts. Enjoy!

Chapter One: Before Dawn

The darkness was absolute, no matter how hard Murtagh tried he could not adjust his eyes to it. He was no stranger to shadows or darkness but the darkness in the dungeon of Helgrind was almost unnatural. The cell he lay in was no bigger than a large broom closet and was just as airless. There were no windows to let the light in even if it did still exist out there, somewhere beyond his grasp. The door was heavy oak, fastened with forged iron bars and locks. The possibility of light penetrating it was nonexistent, he might as well have hoped for sun light in a tomb.

For a tomb it was, Murtagh knew the first day he had been thrown into it that he was not expected to come out of it again. At least, not in the shape he entered it. Like everything else in Helgrind, this was a room meant for breaking. A place meant to extinguish every ember of hope, joy or faith a man held in his heart...or his mind. The last part frightened Murtagh the most, the fact that Galbatorix wanted to break his mind. Pain he could handle, his body could be torn to pieces and he'd grin right in his tormentor's face. Life as the son of Morzan had taught at least one thing, how to with stand pain. As soon as he was old enough to understand he learned how to take a beating without it breaking him. Every time he was whipped or beaten he would disappear into his own mind an indominatable smile upon his lips as his father , or his tutor or any of the others railed at him. He refused to let them know they hurt him, it was not until after they left he would let the pain come. His mind had saved his life and his sanity, without it he would be helpless. What scared and angered him most of all, was he was certain Galbatorix knew it.

Being tortured by Galbatorix was worse than any beating Morzan had ever given him. The beatings of his youth had only wounded his body, but when Galbatorix tortured he was after your mind. Five days he'd spent in pitch darkness, not knowing whether it was day or night with only rags to cover his body and damp, rotten straw for a bed. He was chained even as he slept, one ankle bound to the wall on a chain just long enough to reach the door, but not long enough to escape. As though he could go anywhere with the guards.

Murtagh knew Galbatorix did not want him dead, he was fed daily by a slot in the door. He received slightly better food then the other prisoners, bread and cheese and once in a while a taste of meat. Of course he ate none of it, he was not going to prolong Galbatorix's little dance of death if he could help it. Like a cat, Galbatorix liked to play with his prey before he finished them off, he wouldn't give him that pleasure.

The only times he Glimpsed the world outside his cell was when he was "Interrogated" a fancy word Galbatorix used for torture.

It was always the same. He would be chained to a stone slab and blind folded. ( He was never allowed to look at his tormentors.) Then the questions would start. He could recite them by heart now if he chose.

" Where were the Shade Slayer and his dragon going?"

" What had he learned from the Varden of their plans?"

" What allies did they have?"

The list would go on and he would stay silent, gritting his teeth as he was struck bloody. Then the Twins would come. He could always sense them before he heard them, a knife poking at his consciousness and voices hissing. "You cannot escape. You are ours."

He would fight, he would curse and rail against them using both body and mind to shut them out, but always they got in. But never completely, he could still shut them out of the most important things, the things he'd sworn not to reveal. But every day they got closer and he did not know if he could keep them away much longer. At the end of every session he wasn't sure who he hated more : The twins, Eragon or himself.

Now as he lay on his side on the cold, damp cell floor he wished he could sleep, but as tired as his body was he had sworn never to let his mental guard down, there was no telling who might be around. Feeling heavy and numb he took stock of the injuries of the day. He touched his face and felt the puffy, tender, swelling where an Urgal had struck him with a mailed fist. Hot pokers meant to loosen his tongue had succeeded only in leaving a stinging, blistering rash of sores upon his chest which would burst and join the host of other scars there. He stretched his legs and felt the ache where he'd been held in place while the twins did their work. The worst was his back which was a mass of raw flesh, even his old scar from his father was barely visible beneath the new net of wounds and scars.

But above everything else the throbbing ache in his head was what made him suffer the most. As he lay there memories like honeyed sea water seeped gently back into his blistering brain. Images of his first meeting with Eragon, of their travels back when they were still equals, before Eragon had known he was Morzan's son. Then the memory of the Varden, the suspicious look in his friend's eyes that had wounded him worse than any torture. Of course he had still fought for him. That was the thing about Eragon, even if you COULD hate him, you couldn't hate what he stood for. He had never hated him at any rate, no matter how infuriating he could be somehow hating him did not seem right. He could not put his finger on where the loyalty came from, it was just there. He would have trusted Eragon with his life….no…with his mind and that was much more precious to him.

"Then where are you?" he asked the blackness before his eyes, " Why haven't you come for me? You can hear that beast of yours' thoughts why can't you hear mine? What good is your damned magic if it cannot help a friend? Or maybe I'm not worth the effort."

He glared and turned his thoughts away closing his eyes. Who was he kidding? Nothing was going to save him, he was beyond saving. " Shade slayer." He muttered, "He gets a title, I get a cell. So goes my life." As he lay there the slot on his cell door slid back and a thin finger of candle light pierced the gloom. Murtagh blinked, but did not move. "Don't waste your time, take it away I won't eat it."

" Why not?"

The question shocked Murtagh, since when did anyone SPEAK to him little own care about him. But what shocked him most of all was this was a woman's voice. In spite of himself he sat up and addressed the slot of light.

"What did you say to me?"

"I asked, Why not. Why shouldn't you eat? Aren't you miserable enough?"

Murtagh gave a disbelieving smile, shaking his head. " I'm not eating anything he gives me. I don't trust him. Not to mention I'm not letting him kill me at his leisure like some amusement."

There was a silence and then a grating sound as a plate was slipped through the door. Murtagh gritted his teeth, " You're wasting your time."

Silence met his ears. He could hear the rustle of a gown as the woman turned to leave. Suddenly he couldn't help himself, this was the first human contact he'd had in days and he couldn't let it end so soon. He lunged at the door. " Hey! Wait! Don't go!"

The slot opened again and as Murtagh peered through it he encountered a pair of dark almond shaped eyes . The girl blinked at him in surprise but did not move back. "What do you want, Murtagh?"

Murtagh put his head to one side. " When did I tell you my name?"

The girl laughed softly, " You didn't. But there is no one in this fortress that does not know of Murtagh, son of Morzan."

Murtagh let his head fall forward. " Morzan is no father of mine…I have no father. I never did."

The girl pursed her lips. " You should not deny your blood lines. We cannot choose them, they may not define us but they are a part of us. Own your dark side or others will do it for you and use it against you."

Murtagh narrowed his eyes. " What made you so wise?" he said acidly,

"Being a bastard." She said simply, " All bastard children are wise."

"Please, don't hold anything back…"

"I am not ashamed. " She shrugged, " I am what I am and you are what you are. Nothing will change that."

Murtagh looked at the dark orbs and sighed, " I'm too tired to argue, but you're a little late with your advice."

The dark orbs fluttered, " You say so." She said gently, " Did you want something?"

Murtagh thought a moment, but he could find no reason to detain her. "No." he said softly.

"Then I will go."

"Wait!" What was it about this girl that he could not bear to see her go? Murtagh chided himself for his weakness. " Why are you being so kind to me?"

The girl looked at him her eyes showing no emotion. Murtagh thought they were the saddest eyes he'd ever seen, except maybe his mothers. " Because we are the same." She said simply, Murtagh was puzzled. " How are we the same?" But suddenly there was a sound and the girl startled and turned to go. Murtagh reached out for her.

"Wait, what do I call you?"

The dark orbs darted aside then back to his eyes, " My name is Nula, we will meet again." With that she was gone and the darkness came again. Murtagh lay back onto his side again, but this time instead of the dark it seemed every where he looked all he could see were the woman's sad, dark eyes. " Nula." He thought, where had he heard that name before. Suddenly he remembered a fraction of the old language he had learned as a child. Nula was a word….it meant 'empty or nothing'. He smiled in spite of himself. " Well, when I said nothing could save me I never expected this." He chuckled grimly, at the very least he had something he never dreamed of having in this place. A friend.

"Tell me where they are!" Murtagh bit his lip as the Urgal guard above him dug his long nails into his shoulder which was already raw and bleeding from yet another beating. He didn't speak, the interrogator a tall man in a hooded cloak that obscured his features spoke sharply, it was apparent his patience was nearing it's end. " Five days…" he said, " Five blasted days we've kept you here. Fed you, kept you alive all so that The King could have his answers and still you will not speak!"

The Urgal squeezed harder and Murtagh tasted blood in his mouth. _I'm not here._ He thought to himself, _I'm some where else, somewhere safe, some where no one will ever hurt me again. No one can touch me._

"You're a loyal one, I'll give you that. This "Shade Slayer" must have won you over well, tell me Murtagh what lies did he tell you? "

_Not here. Not here. You can't touch me._

The guard chuckled moving closer. " Oh I know, he told you you were like a brother to him didn't he? That he TRUSTED you, that he NEEDED you." Another cruel laugh, " That's what you always wanted isn't it, Murtagh? To redeem yourself, to serve a purpose, to not be alone." Murtagh felt his resolve to keep silent wavering he clenched his jaw and closed his eyes.

_Not here. Not Here. _

"Well, I'm sorry to tell you Murtagh but the only purpose you served to him was another soldier to fight his battles for him, another servant to do his bidding. He had no feelings for you anymore then a war lord does for his soldiers. You are on your own Murtagh, you are ALONE."

Murtagh felt his lips twitch with suppressed laughter, the irony of the moment was just too perfect. Did this man think he was telling him some horrible secret? He'd known he was alone all along.

"You think this is funny, do you?" the man hissed, his face inches from Murtagh's, the smell of him was like dust and parchment. " Go ahead and laugh…you'll not be laughing when were through with you. We will find that boy, with or without your help and when we do you'll wish you'd done as you were told."

Murtagh laughed again, it was a release and a defiance it reminded him he was alive. " You won't find them."

" Ah…he speaks…what makes you think we won't find them? What makes you think we haven't already?"

For a moment Murtagh's heart fluttered, then he remembered the tricks. " Well," he said, " If you'd found them you wouldn't be so pissed off."

Wham!

Murtagh felt his body arch and his muscles clench painfully as a burning searing pain filled his body. The man in the cloak made a tutting noise. "Such a waste. You could have been so much more then..This."

Slowly the pain subsided and Murtagh fell back gasping. He spat, the sour taste of blood in his mouth. " Like you, you mean. No thanks, I'd rather take my chances with the reaper."

"You're trying my patience. Do you want another session with the Twins?"

Murtagh tried not to let his fear show. " Go ahead, let them try, how did it worked the other times by the way?"

"Silence!"

Another jolt of pain and for a moment blackness took him. But as soon as his vision cleared he was on his guard again. The man's face hovered above him.

"You think you can keep this up forever? You fool! No one can hide from us forever."

" Just watch me."

The man stormed across the room, "You will break, Murtagh Morzanson. I promise you that and when you do you will beg for your death from me."

" Is that what my mother did? Did he make her beg before he killed her or did he let his gaurds do it for him?"

" ENOUGH! Silence him!"

The Urgal released his shoulder and his hands went to Murtaghs throat . Suddenly the strong hands squeezed and Murtagh found himself struggling for air. He clawed at the hands, he heard the man's voice from a ways away.

"Gently, gently, I want him quiet..not dead. Do you feel that Murtagh?"

Spots danced before Murtaghs eyes, his lungs burned and he could hear the blood in his ears. A darkness was falling.

"This is what it's like to die. I could kill you now if I wished, even now your life is slipping away."

Murtagh choked clawing at the hands. " You hold your life very dear don't you, boy? You don't want to die do you? "

Murtagh closed his eyes. _If I'm going to die, at least I will die free._ But the hand released him and he fell back choking and gasping. The voice was hollow. " No. I will not let you out of this so easily, I want to see you beg for it. Take him away!"

It was not until he reached his cell Murtagh allowed his guard to relax, he collapsed on the straw covered floor trembling and wretching in the darkness. Tears of pain stung his eyes and all the curses he uttered were not enough to end the ache in his heart. He always tried not to let their words get to him…but some times they slipped through just the same. When he'd finally reached the end of his energy he turned onto his side again and glared at the wall he wondered if sleep would win this night, he knew it would eventually. He hoped Nula would come, that he had not missed his chance to speak to her again. His eyes had just begun to close when the slot on the door opened and Nula's voice whispered his name. He scrambled to his feet, bracing himself against the door and put his face to the slot where the same dark almond eyes met his. A thin, pale mouth smiled shyly at him, there was pity and apology in Nula's eyes.

"They told me not to feed you."

"I'm not surprised. It's good to see you."

The mouth smiled fleetingly, " I should not be here. Here,"

She slid an apple and a piece of cheese through the slot, " Tell no one. If he ever knew I disobeyed."

Murtagh finished the apple in two bites and started on the cheese.

"I thought you weren't eating. I thought you didn't trust them."

Murtagh swallowed and met her eyes, " You, I trust."

Nula looked away for a moment, she was like a little bird ready to fly at the slightest hint of danger.

"I don't have much time. But I must know…do you really know The Shade Slayer?"

Murtagh finished the cheese and wiped his mouth with his hand.

"What do you know about the Shade Slayer?" he said with a wry smile, " You can't have been outside these walls often."

"I am always listening, knowledge is the one weapon I Possess here. The one weapon I can use against him now."

Murtagh looked at her, " Yes. I knew him and his dragon. But that's all I'll tell, I swore to tell no one."

The girl nodded. Then an almost childlike look of curiosity filled her eyes. " Can you tell me one thing more?"

"That depends."

" The Shade Slayer's dragon….I hear it is a female. Is it true?"

Murtagh looked away. " Perhaps it is…perhaps it isn't. "

Nula smiled, " I'm right aren't I? I can see it in your eyes. The dragon is a she, I knew it!"

Murtagh sighed, " Yes. You're right…but why are you so excited?"

Nula fell silent, " I am a she as well." She said, " I had long hoped for a female dragon to hatch."

Murtagh studied her down cast eyes. " There's more to it than that…but I suppose that makes us equal."

Nula smiled and Murtagh felt a curious warmth fill him as though he'd just drank a rich wine. " You should go."

"No, wait." She moved close to him and her voice was desperate. " You've been very brave, I know what they put you through. But you must not tell them what you know…you must hold on. If you tell them we are all as good as dead."

" We? You're speaking against…"

"You think I LIKE Galbatorix? " She snorted, " You think I'm on his side? He killed my mother and he would have killed me too if he hadn't found a use for me. No. I want him dead…but first I want to see him brought to his knees. Your shade slayer will do this."

Murtagh gaped at her, " Be careful Nula…if he hears you we'll be sharing this cell."

" I don't care."

"I do!"

Nula smiled again, " You are so willing to let yourself suffer Murtagh Morzanson, but you cannot bare to see it befall others. How unlike your father you are."

"Thank you." Said Murtagh, " I couldn't ask for a better compliment."


	2. Cruel Measures

" Yield, you fool ! Yield!"

Murtagh lay, eyes closed and back arched on the stone table. Sweat stood on his forehead in thick droplets and he'd long since lost touch with his body. Under the throbbing, burning, pain of the Twins mental assault his brain strained for freedom. In the darkness behind his eyes colors blossomed and burst across his vision. It seemed the questioner was worried about losing his source of information.

The Twins were enjoying themselves, he could feel it.

" _Where is he? Where is the Shade Slayer?"_

"_Get out…"_

" _Tell us where he is!"_

"_No…go to hell!"_

"_We'll send you there first !"_

Murtagh bit his lips as the assault began again. He clenched his fists and concentrated on blocking his mind. He felt the Twins hold waver slightly and inwardly he smiled.

"_You are strong, Murtagh Morzanson. But we are stronger. Give in now and spare yourself some pain."_

" _Get…out of…__**my head!"**_

Murtagh summoned all his strength and pushed against the Twins. There was a cry of frustration and the pain ceased.

Murtagh opened his eyes wearily, the Twins were glowering at him. It was the most beautiful sight he'd ever seen.

" Well?" said the cloaked man, " Did you learn anything?"

The Twins growled " No." The man frowned and Murtagh forced himself to laugh.

"I told you. Didn't I tell you? I don't give up!"

The questioner was hanging over him now , so close Murtagh could see the strange symbols on his cloak. A sorcerer …that was all he needed. " You will break….we're not through with you yet!"

The Twins smiled secretively. Murtagh felt his hackles rise, he knew what that smile meant.

" We've been kind. Now we must be cruel, we warned you."

Murtagh was hurled back ward as the twins' combined consciousness slammed into his already bruised mind. He floundered for a moment , gained control briefly then images began to fill his mind unbidden, memories he'd sought to forget.

He was in the great hall of his father's castle. Morzan sat before the hearth, Zar'roc across his lap, the blade gleaming heart blood red in the fire light as he rasped the whet stone over it again and again. A boy sat on ground by the hearth eating bread and cheese. It took Murtagh a moment before he realized it was himself as a young boy. Morzan's hunting hounds were sprawled about him and he was sharing his food with them.

"Murtagh!" His father's voice was a cold growl, " Stop feeding those mangy curs our food!"

"They're hungry too father."

"Aye, and we feed them enough as it is."

There was a moment's silence, then the boy spoke the words almost as Murtagh remembered them.

"Then why are they so hungry?"

He heard Zar'roc's scabbard fall to the ground as in one motion Morzan crossed the room and struck him. "Do as I say!"

Murtagh saw himself rise and slink across the room. He tripped over Zar'roc's scabbard and went sprawling nearly upsetting a nearby table. Morzan hauled him up by the front of his doublet and raised his fist.

"Morzan!"

The shock of hearing his mother's voice, silent for so many years was nearly enough to make Murtagh lose his guard. But he regained control. Selena's eyes were sad and stormy like his own, she seized Morzan's hand.

"Morzan, stop! He's just a boy!"

"Ten years is old enough to learn respect. He'll learn it or I'll beat it into him."

His mother did not release her grasp, her voice was pleading. " Morzan, please. Put him down, he's your son!"

"You stay out of this!" Morzan spat at her, " The only reason I keep you around at all is because you were lucky enough to give me him! I should just let HIM have you, for all the use you are to me now."

"Stop it!" Murtagh heard himself say, but suddenly his mother grabbed Morzan's arm twisting it painfully behind his back, her eyes wells of cold fire.

"Say it to me again!" she hissed, " Go on, say it! You're not afraid of a woman are you?"

Morzan's face was livid, but it was also terrified. " Selena…." He began.

"Did you think I would just take it? You should know me better, you made me what I am. "

"Selena, the boy…"

His mother's voice was a hiss, " Let him go or this won't be the only hand you'll lose."

All at once he was on the ground, Murtagh saw his mother's eyes soften.

"Murtagh, go to your Tornac."

"No!"

" Do as I say! Now!"

All at once Morzan reached around and broke his mother's grasp. The room seemed to quiver as he threw her away from him. Murtagh saw her strike the wall, then all at once Morzan was on her. A loud slap and a cry rent the air. "I'll teach you to turn on me!"

"Leave her alone!" Holding a silver candle stick like a battle axe, Murtagh saw his child self charge at his father. One swipe and he was on the ground. He watched his father reach for Zar'roc murder in his eyes.

"Murtagh, run!"

His mother threw her arms around her husband, but he threw her off. Murtagh watched as Zar'rocs blood red blade hurtled through the air as his father hurled it at his retreating back. He heard a metallic clang, the sound of his own voice crying out. Then his mother screaming and screaming.

Suddenly he realized it was his own voice screaming now, begging the Twins to stop like a child himself. Then quite suddenly he felt his consciousness waver, wink for one moment and instantly his control was gone.

Unbidden and unwanted images flitted across his eyes. Things he'd seen while with Eragon and Saphira. Things he'd been told, things he'd sworn to protect. He fought to regain control but more and more was revealed and he knew the Twins had succeeded. Murtagh was frantic , he had to regain control while the most important information still remained secret. Still the images played out in his mind. Finally in sheer desperation he forced himself forward then slammed his head back against the rock the blinding pain blotted out all thought. He felt the Twins withdraw , something wet and warm was dripping down his neck. Then the darkness took him.


End file.
